**WARNING GRAPHIC LANGUAGE**
Okay, so I was asked to be a contributor to this website. To write reviews, give my opinions. I can do that. So why not start with one of her books.
Man, I may actually tear them all apart.
She’d be fuckin pissed.
Anyhow, Omnicide.
What the hell is omnicide anyhow? Am I the only one that hasn’t heard of that word? I asked, Hal of course he said in his pompous fucking wat said, “Of course, Frank, doesn’t everyone?”
Which told me, he didn’t know.
So I quizzed him.
“What does it mean, Hal?”
“You don’t know.”
“I know,” I said. “I’m asking you because I don’t think you know.”
“I know.”
“So tell me.”
“Why … would I tell you? In fact, I’m sure you haven’t a clue what it means.”
He talks like that you know? Drives me fucking nuts.
So I broke it down, I’m good like that. Omni – Side.
Omni means everything.
Side means, well, to the side. But then you put it together. What the hell? Everything is sideways. Okay, cool. A book about everything going sideways.
Hal just looked at me in that judge me because he’s not me way and said, “That is not what it means. Omnicide means an extinction event caused by man.”
Wait. What? How does that even sound like that word means that. An extinction event caused by man. Would it be just a man or could a woman work? I mean if an apocalypse could only be caused a man, that would be pretty sexist. And wouldn’t the name be alphacide? Then I thought if Alphacide is the name for a man causing an apocalypse what is the female version of Alpha.
Guess what?
There is none.
Man. Not being sexist that's just an expression.
Anyhow, back to Omnicide. An extinction event caused by man. Which is not original. Nuclear war, Dean’s virus (See how I slipped that in there because Dean is a man, well…)
Okay, so the book. I got off track, Hal does that to me. It’s about some bugs that get out of control and they create a pesticide that not only kills the bugs but makes this stuff grow everywhere suffocating people, I think. Not sure. I got confused on that.
I actually didn’t understand why things were growing until she explained why. Which … I can’t tell because that would be a spoiler.
The sick deer were fucking cool, though.
Some of the characters were okay. She could have done well with the stripper cop if .. she didn’t give him a name like Kit. Who the fuck looks at the son as a baby and said, “Oh, whoa, hey, he looks like a Kit.” Then he grows up to call his own kid .. Kat?
And this guy is a badass cop? Good thing he grew up in a small town, anywhere else would be like, “What the fuck kind of name is Kit.”
But since I’m limited on space, I have to end this. I’ll end with the Frank Scale. It goes from zero to five with five being the best because it’s higher. So you can judge.
Apocalypse Value – 5
Humor – 2 (Would have been lower if the guys name wasn’t Kit)
Graphic deaths – 1
Death count – 5
Zombies – 0
So it scored a 13/25. Hal says I’m not being fair.
Who cares.
Until next time.
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